Who am I kidding, my life is not captivating. Has it ever been? Last night as I was falling asleep I confessed to my cat who was laying on me that I don't seem to matter to anyone. My sister calls every day and totally has hardly anything to say on the phone. That's about it. My other sister wouldn't call for anything. She sleeps till almost noon and doesn't go anywhere for some excuse or another. If it weren't for Debbi and the kids, the only contact with humans I would have would be the checkout people at the stores. I have tried, especially in the last year, to get together with people now and then. We set up a date and then something comes up or they change their mind. I am questioning my significance in this world. I know who I am in Christ, but sometimes it would just be nice to have a human to relate to. You know what I mean.
It has been a year since the fallout of my former friend. I continue to see her at church with her new friend, holding hands, smooching, doing things together. I don't care what people say, it still hurts. You can forgive, but you never forget.
Tired of wallowing in any self pity, I try and move forward. I try and get involved in other things, but nothing seems to be working. I know it's hard to get to know me because I'm so quiet, I appear to be standoffish. Just remember, appearances are deceiving.
Enough for now
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